Since announcing our plans to adopt, Adam and I have been asked many questions. These questions range from “how did you come to the decision to adopt?” to “what kind of child are you hoping for?” and “what is the timeline for the process?” We love to talk about adoption, and share what God has laid so deeply on our own hearts, so these questions (although often redundant for us) are a joy to answer!
Although I haven’t been the most consistent blogger, I’m hoping to answer some of the most common questions we are asked, through this venue. Starting TODAY!
One of the most common questions we are asked is “what made you decide to adopt domestically?”
When we started seriously researching adoption, about eight months ago, we were open to either domestic or international. We spent hours sifting through the pro’s and con’s of each process. My heart has been very tied to China, since I spent a year there back in 2007-2008, and I have always wanted to adopt from there. At this point, Adam and I don’t qualify for a Chinese adoption. It’s definitely something we would consider in the future though, when we do qualify!
We spent a lot of time praying through adopting from Ethiopia (one of the only countries we qualified for because of our age and length of marriage). I had been keeping up with adoption news from that country for a few months, and due to the process significantly slowing down there, we didn’t think it would be wise to jump in when many other couples have been waiting for years now.
Throughout that time, we kept coming back to domestic adoption. One of my dear friends, and her husband, were in a domestic adoption process at that time. They have since welcomed their sweet daughter home! Watching them go through all the up’s and down’s, praying for them, crying for and rejoicing for them, grew our hearts for birthmothers and a baby from the USA. Before watching them go through the process, I probably would have never thought twice about domestic adoption.
As Adam and I prayed, the Lord kept turning our hearts toward a domestic adoption for many reasons. Here are three of the biggest reasons:
Why Domestic Adoption?
1) There are extraordinary missional possibilities with domestic adoption! Adopting from our own country gives us the amazing privilege of knowing, and possibly having a relationship with, the birthmother of our child. As we read and research the benefits, our hearts are growing more towards an open adoption. We would love the opportunity to get to know this phenomenal woman (whoever she may be!), and possibly have an agreement with her where we are able to grow and nurture our relationship over time. This could look a million different ways, but regardless of the details, we are eager to show her Jesus and how great He is.
2) Domestic adoption is an action that supports our pro-life conviction. We live in a country where it is frighteningly easy for a woman to get an abortion. A woman in the USA who has CHOSEN to make an adoption plan for her child is truly an extraordinary woman! We believe that a domestic adoption is one of the best ways to support her, and put action to our own convictions about the sanctity of life.
3) Although there is a huge need for orphans to be adopted internationally, we also see a great need right here in the USA. We are open to adopting a child of any race. For Adam and I, the color of our baby’s skin was never an issue for us. The reality with domestic adoption is that the waiting list for a caucasian baby is much longer than the waiting list for an african american, biracial, or hispanic baby. This breaks our hearts, and we couldn’t imagine not standing in the gap to meet this need.
We recognize that there will be challenges with a transracial adoption, but it’s not an obstacle we aren’t willing to tackle. We believe the gospel, and that changes everything for us.
I love the way Russell Moore puts it in his book Adopted for Life (which I think every Christian couple should read!):
Adoption highlights the spiritual over the physical. The gospel does the same. We are brought into God’s family by adoption, not by a physical birth, but by a spiritual one. We are excited to meet this need by God’s grace.